I was terrified of sharks when I started ocean swimming. I’d hear the Jaws theme song in my head when I drove down to the beach. I’d glance nervously at the other swimmers and imagine which of us looked like the most tantalizing seal. I couldn’t relax in the water, thinking every wave was an ominous black fin, every fleck of seaweed the tentacles of a sea monster.

After a month swimming weekly with the same group, I found myself chugging along in the water, breathing regularly, admiring the shoreline going by, and letting my mind wander aimlessly. Wait a second, I’m relaxed! I realized. Actually, I was more than relaxed. I was having fun. Sharks never crossed my mind.

What changed? There had been a shark attack a week ago about two hours down the coast, so it wasn’t like I had convinced myself that the threat was gone. My big epiphany, as I swam tranquilly through the rolling waves, was that I had never really been afraid of sharks in the first place.

Sharks were the BIG, obvious, easy thing to be afraid of when it came to ocean swimming. It sounds pretty rational to say, “I’m nervous about sharks.” Everyone can understand that. But it was less easy to explain all the little things I was afraid of or anxious about: Where do I park and what do I do with my car keys? Will I look like an idiot trying to get into my wetsuit? How cold is it going to be and what if I take too long getting in? Will I be fast enough to keep up with the group? Where do I sight? How exactly do you sight? What if I get tired; there aren’t any walls out there to rest on!? And on and on and on. When I look back on it, I was scared and nervous about a lot of things.

But I ignored all those little fears and put on my tough-girl-I-can-do-anything act. And all I’d admit to was being afraid of sharks. I let all of my little fears accumulate into that single monster fear.

I was only able to relax and enjoy ocean swimming after I had done it enough times to know the answers to all my initial concerns. I learned these things slowly through experience. But I bet I would have gotten over my exaggerated shark fear earlier if I had been mindful of what I was really afraid of all along: the little things.

Below is a journaling exercise to help you shift your own mindset about fear. The goal is to identify all the little things that hold you back from truly loving what you’re doing, or keep you from pursuing your dreams. If you can discover what your own “shark” is, then you can also figure out how it’s just the boogeyman under the bed. Writing allows you to face your fears, attack them logically and grow beyond them!

Journal Exercise

  1. What is a BIG thing you’re afraid of that’s holding you back from fully enjoying or pursuing something you want to do?
  2. Make a list of all the little things that are frightening, nerve-racking, or anxiety-producing related to this pursuit.
  3. Number that list, with 1 being the most upsetting.
  4. Review your list and ask yourself if you know how to alleviate any of these fears. Is there someone you can ask? Can you do some helpful research on the Internet?
  5. Set a goal to take one action step every week (or whatever timeline works best for you) to alleviate one of the little fears. I’d recommend tackling the fears that are easiest to deal with first, so you have more confidence, clarity, and energy to deal with the trickier ones later.
  6. Track your progress. Jot down some notes when you begin this journal about how stressed, upset, or afraid you’re feeling. Every time you do the activity (or maybe once a week if this is a daily activity) write another short description of your feelings. Fear isn’t an off/on switch. You’ll get more comfortable slowly; oftentimes, so slowly that you don’t notice. But if you keep a log of your feelings, then you can be more attuned to these slight improvements.

“Curiosity will conquer fear even more than bravery will,” said James Stephens.

So go out there and face your sharks! And share your process in the comment section below 🙂

Samantha Morse